Talk by Professor Willy Wang on Tuesday, 10 April 2007 at 7.30 pm

Dear Members

Our mission at Bel'Air is to be the leading company for marketing the best products that enhance health and beauty. To accomplish that, we have to consistently keep ourselves updated on product knowledge for the benefit of our customers.

We are very pleased to announce that we have invited PROFESSOR WILLY WANG, an expert in the scientific study of skin and cosmetology to conduct a series of talks, starting with the topic on " UNDERSTAND THE ANATOMY OF SKIN - THE PROPER WAY TO CARE FOR YOUR SKIN ". In this talk, he will share with us his knowledge and tips of caring for the largest organ of our body, to help us build health as well as confidence.

For the details of the talk, please see the attached poster.

Thank you.

Sincerely yours
The Management
Shiang Series Pte Ltd

英特爾總經理專訪

人生有很多轉折，不是個人能完全規劃，但人生路上你可以掌握3個C，此外，我們所處的時代，變化太大，所以在社會上不要僅做一行，而要跨行！跨行指的是除了讀本科的書之外，還要接觸其他的知識。

人生中有很多轉折，不是個人所能夠完全規劃或掌握的，但人生路上你可以掌握3個C。
人生3C就是Competence、Communication 和 Cooperation。

Competence = 專業能力

首先，你要有competence(能力)，能力是你的本事和專業，要事先發掘你自己的專長。電機系畢業生，不代表你就是電機專才，以前我在新聞社有個朋友，他是學土木的，現在卻投身於出版業。所以，並不是你讀什麼，未來的職業就是什麼。在我的人生路上，曾經遇見許許多多好導師，適時給我一些建議及想法，使得我的思維能及時轉變，朝向對的方向發展。我的第一個工作，是在聲寶企業做音響設計，但隨即發覺我的個性，不太適合在實驗室裡做研究，因此轉至震旦行做Sales，賣影印機。賣著賣著，逐漸發覺我的人生，開始對的方向走，後又至汽車音響公司做業務行銷，繼而走人外商公司－－台灣通用器材，擔任東南亞區銷售總監，當時我才28歲。

人格特質決定人生方向

猶記第一次出國到達歐洲比利時，人地生疏、加以當時我的英文相當不流利，但是在當地硬是住了三個月，不斷磨練英文，從一九七八年來，到現在已屆 20年了，老外看到我，總會以為我是從美國哪所學校畢業的，我常笑著回答：「我在台灣完成大學學業。」 找到興趣後，確定全力以赴的方向，再慢慢來培養專長。興趣之中其實蘊含很強烈的人格特質，我個人以為，人格特質決定人生努力主要道路。有的人適合在實驗室裡做研究，我並不適合，但是，我沒有放棄專長，擔任總經理一職已有12個年頭了，憑藉著的就是我的專長(Competence)。學校教授的東西，通常只是一塊叩門磚，真正的學習一定要靠自己。我出門時，背包裡裝的一定都是書籍，家裡也都是各類的書，一有時間就看，不斷地跟新知識，跟的快我就贏過別人，跟的慢我就可能輸了。

Communication = 有效溝通

第二，要有溝通的能力（Communication）。如何作有效溝通，來表達你的理想與見解，這是一個大學問，黑幼龍就掌握到這個市場。舉個例子，我手底下大概有40﹪人才，擁有博碩士學位，他們因著個人不同的經驗，與我對話時，會mapping 自己的經驗世界，用以了解我在講什麼；然而，他所接收到與我所指的方向，通常會有出入，這就要仰仗溝通能力。譬如說交談時，我不只要確定你有沒有完全了解，或者同不同意我的看法，這就是一個溝通的技巧。在社會上成功與否，溝通是一種很重要的能力。

Cooperation = 統御融合

第三，是合作(Cooperation)。如果只是一個人在某個角落埋頭苦幹，你的價值只有一個人；倘若你學會溝通，學會合作，那你就有機會成為統御一方的經理級人物。當一個領導人，要有開闊的心。每個人要求與成就都不一樣，想的更是不一樣，你如何將這些個體的差異性融合起來(Cooperation)，成就一股宏大的力量，如此才能成就leadership。

所以說，在學校中要盡量參加社團，社團中有各院系的人，思想邏輯各擅勝場，他們不同的思考模式，往往會增加你對待事物的深度與廣度。過去，在主持「成大新聞」時，我們的使命感很強，這是人文面的；而在辦「成功思潮」時，則是哲學邏輯面的。以前我在學校讀心理學、社會學，該讀的我都讀了，再透過與許多人的接觸，逐漸養成融合眾家人才智慧結晶的能力，欲在日後進入社會歷練時很受用。不要將自己禁錮在一個領域，多去嘗試接觸不同科系的人，彼此交錯影響之下，常常會造就出一個個偉大的靈魂來。

人文素養 ＆ 生命深度

當一個人沒有人文思考、人文素養的時候，他就只是一個機器人，欠缺生活品質的富裕度與豐富性(richness)。物質上的富有，遠不如心靈上的富有來得重要；我經常隨身帶著背包，在行道樹間感受台北的人文面向。從事高科技的人看起來好像很忙碌，但我們的忙碌是有節奏性的，所以我不會覺得厭煩，我們曉得自己為何而忙。這一路走來這麼長遠，支撐我們的是生命的力量，是生命的豐富性，是人文的深度。我的生命之旅中，有幾句鼓勵自己的話：
第一，學習是一種態度，我對自己的投資亳不吝嗇，特別是在買書方面。
第二，我會給自己規劃許多時間讀書，為了要求讀書的效率，我選擇付上代價，找間安靜恬適的茶藝館，給自己很好的quality time去讀書。讀書是一種讀者與作者間的對話，重點不在讀，而是在思考到底手上這本書，對你而言，代表什麼意義，你要去思考，懂得反饋(feedback)。讀書重質不重量，我寧可一天只讀半本書或一本書，然後好好告訴自己，讀完這本書，我的生命、行為思考模式，會有多大的改變，進而增強自己生命的力量。我在高中、大學時代就經常買書，舊書攤我也常去。現在我都上網訂明天要出版的書，走在時代的最前端，不斷跟著時代的腳步。一個人懂得去學習，懂得自己到底要什麼，是很重要的。

市場價值決定加薪幅度

今天這個時代充滿疑惑，你到底在追求什麼？要知道你的時間很有限，你追求的必須是一個focus，一個專精，你才有機會成功。今天的社會充滿垃圾訊息，而你必須去掌握自己的方向，去追求有用的知識，你在哪一個行業，你要的know-how是哪一方面，不斷跟進；就像衝浪，你要在浪的最上方，不要被捲下去了，這就是學習。終身學習的態度是很重要的，當你朝對的這條路走時，錢自然會滾滾而來，根本不用費心，更沒有必要立志以賺錢為人生的主要目標。我深信，個人要求的是自我能力的成長，不斷充實內涵的豐富性。

最近，我幫員工加薪，加薪的考量不是依據服務年資的長短，而是工作的內容。你負的責任有多少，你的市場價值在那裡，以市場價值為加薪的依據。譬如說某人原來就是屬於高薪階級，可是以一個老闆的立場來看，若這份工作市場價值不高，承擔的責任不多，那我就不會替他加薪。反過來說，若某人成長的速度很快，能力不斷飛升，自然能夠承擔更多的責任，完成更多的大事。在這種狀況之下，加薪的成長空間相對增加。老實說，不要去作金錢的規劃，想說今年以賺進幾百萬為目標，如此一來，你可能會一場空。

人生導師，廣開視野

另外，我給予在學的人的建議是：多參加社團活動，或者找尋人生的導師。我們有所謂人生中的導師，請他觀察我的行為，給我意見，人生中這一件事是很打緊的，通常一個人在不同階段，需要不同的人生導師(mentor)。有些好公司會針對這種資源，設立一套諮詢系統，鼓勵員工私下找尋自己的mentor，讓他來當observer，觀察你是否有朝著自己的目標邁進，定期給予諮商者意見。在人生中的每個階段，我都會自己去尋找mentor，其中也包含我的同學在內。
什麼叫導師？就是與你沒有利害衝突的人，他是會跟你講真話的人，使你瞭解真相，使你提升生命的力量。我的大學時代，在社團中結交不少好朋友，而我受惠最多的當屬Σ社，我們那票人都是哲學思考型的，有數學系，有工程系等等，而且我們非常投緣，我們談論許多事，包含人生的思考，其實人生的思考，在大學是很basic且相當重要的思考。從前我也做過班代，我記得我會在禮拜六的下午，召集全班在大榕樹下舉行自由交談，談人生，談哲學，無所不包。這就是一個環境，你必須交到這一類型的朋友，你的人生走起來才不會很辛苦。我有些同學走得很封閉，現在是個博士，and so what？我一個學士，在我手底下工作的有很多是取得名校博士學位的員工。無所謂，人生各擁有一片天，重點就在於你的人格特質。

一輩子的朋友，相互淬勵

透過你的學習network，和與你興味相投的人連結，這些人會對你的人生有很大的幫助。從前我們在Σ社，談唯物論、唯心論，什麼都談，接觸面比較廣之後，融匯成自己的思想。記得當時我在成功思潮中寫文章批判萬年國代，我辦許多活動，就是為了使學生朝向更開闊的思想空間。社會不斷變化，你必須去掌握的部分，其實就是思考邏輯的精準度，其實思考邏輯也在不斷改變，真正不變的是學習。Σ社及後期的幾個社團，對我受益良多的是：這些朋友的思考及談論的主題，跟我蠻相近的，這是一種思考及辯論的淬勵，辯論的結果，我已經不記得了，但當中思考邏輯、思考方法及過程成為我生命的一部分，而這些朋友，我們已經有很多年沒見了，但我可以保證走在路上絕對可以認出他來；這是終身的朋友，不會因為外表的蛻變而有所質變，這是人格特質讓我們終其一生強烈地相互吸引。我有很多的朋友，我們彼此互相幫助，share我們的ideas，而這些朋友不見得常在我身邊，可能五年十年都沒碰面，但是見面的話，就一見如故，心裡的感動很深，這是一輩子的朋友。

跨行，路無限寬廣

今天我們所處的時代，變化太大，所以我們在社會上不要僅做一行，而要跨行！

跨行指的是除了讀本科的書之外，還要去接擉其他的知識；跨行的value比單就一行的value要高出許多，因為這種人才稀奇罕有。今天我檯面上的身份是科技人，我的專長是marketing，倘使你找我去商學院上行銷課，我保證講得比任何教授都好－－我有二十幾年的行銷經驗。這又牽涉到人格特質，因為我喜歡跟別人溝通來往，所以我對人的消費行為很敏感。知道自己有這方面的特質，我就不斷找機會磨練自己，讓自己不斷的growth。記得在成大時，我沒有拿過任何一次的演講冠軍，但是踏入社會後，我將自己投注到演講的場合去，我經常拿演講冠軍。當兵時當了一年的教官，經常對著幾萬人演講，之後也帶領一些演講辯論的社團，培養我的溝通能力，不同的場合有不同的演講方式，同樣一個主題有不同的表達方法。我的人格特質有溯尋成長環境的這種趨向，而且以前在Σ社，很多人也有這種特性。漸漸地，我發覺對這類的書，有很強的吸收能力，行銷的書、心理學、社會學、哲學都看，一直看一直跟，久而久之培養了我的人格特質。要給自己更多的機會，去發掘，去培養自己的人格特質。記得早期我在一家外商公司做銷售部經理，當時我英文不怎麼靈光，與一些老外開會，對於他們的談話一知半解，開完會後，老外們彼此閒聊，我無意間聽見他們說，某個人好像聽不懂我們在講什麼，這句話對我打擊很大，後來我就不斷找機會來磨練自己的英文。出了社會之後，除了自己的專長之外，去了解自己的個性，develop你的第二個專長。在社會上真正發揮的舞台是兩個專長共同交結的地方，有很多的機會從這個交結點上產生，這也就是之前所說的跨行的價值－－路，無限寬廣！

承擔責任 ＋ 創意 ＝ 自我價值 ＋ 貢獻

我們經常在分別什麼較勞心，什麼較勞動。外在看起是一樣的，差別只在於你的心情。好比說你有一個工作，其實身在其中你就已在學習，差別在於你用什麼心情來面對一切。如果在工作職場之中，我們習慣性思考著如何把工作做得更好，或者有無更好的創意，如何來improve，你就能成長。若是你與老闆有很好的communication，他告訴你說，第一步怎麼做，第二步，第三步…，那你就全套都學會了。所以說要調整心態，將一個工作變成是學習與成長。我自己的溝通經驗就是如此，當我去跟老闆溝通時，我得到更多的support，更多的resources，從前我比較內向，不會主動與老闆溝通，心想只要我做出來了，自然會有人看到，這種想法，大致沒有錯，但如此一來，做起事會很辛苦，很無趣的，因為只有一個人在做；倘若與老闆溝通過的話，就會得到大批的奧援，做起來就會比較輕鬆，成就感相對也會比較大。不要逃避責任，要去承擔責任。在我們的公司，有一個文化，第一，要承擔責任，進公司就是要承擔責任：assume your responsibility，之後你再去做innovation (創新)，學習如何做的更好，更有創意，當中每一個人都在成長。我們公司每年都會review每一個員工的成長，今年跟去年比起來，他有沒有成長，或者他的成長有沒有比別人快，快的話，薪水就變高。我們的重點不是在賺錢，而是在對公司的contribution(貢獻)及自我的value的提升。

成功因子 ＝ 3C ＋ Feedback

成功人士的要件，取決於人格特質及專長，而不是派系，那是過去的年代獨有的文化。現在要成功的因子也就是我之前談到的3C (Competence、Communication、Cooperation)。這個社會瞬息萬變，你不能說看誰當總經理你就往那靠，也許今天他紅，明天換你紅，或者我離開公司，可能老闆變夥計，也說不一定。我常跟我的秘書說，不要特別去靠近誰，因為你在公司的價值是你的value，是你的專業。所以不要去拉關係，台灣早一代是靠關係，其實，日本那些最強調關係的企業，現在都瓦解了，比如說國際牌，上一代創辦人關係都很好，下一代都沒有了，聲寶也是一樣，下一代著重的是能力。而且這個世界變化太快了，不會因為說我們關係良好，所以我什麼事都找你，不會的。因為我要決定我們公司的命運，成功與否，是在於我的決策，我不會只找我的朋友，這是錯誤的，而是去找最適當的人來合作，這樣才有辦法成功，否則都是拖累。要知道自己要是什麼，或者說，對於自己在人生中的不同成長階段缺乏什麼，你要很清楚。你不能什麼都要，你做不到的。今天你問我，我的缺點是什麼，我一清二楚。我將自己的缺點清楚寫下，貼在我桌子前面，我怎麼去改善，我很清楚。自己要有一個feedback (回饋)系統，如果沒有這個系統，那你跟普通人沒有兩樣，在外面車水馬龍，若想要出類拔萃的話，你必須要知道自己的缺點在哪裡 ，之後針對這些部分去改善。

最重要的事情最先處理

曾經在書上看到這樣一句話－－First things first，最重要的事情最先處理。我們人經常會逃避困難，總是將最困難的事情拖到最後才做，如果你有這種習慣的話，你的人生會過得很痛苦，假設說這個project期限是一個月的話，你大概一個月都沒好日子過。但如果在第一天就把最困難的事情完成，那剩下二十九天就很enjoy，這就是我對付我自己的方法。當一個人慢慢越來越成熟的時候，做事情的模式就會固定。譬如說我昨天去看牙醫，去醫院之前我還特別再刷一次牙，但醫生卻告訴我沒刷乾淨。我一直用我自己的方法在刷牙，但從他的專業角度來看，我沒有刷好。所以，我們人在成長過程中，已經習慣一個工作模式、方法與process。但是，你不見得知道這個方法是對或錯，這時你須要一個feedback system，由外人來feedback 給你，或者你自己來做feedback，假使你知道自己在逃避，在do something wrong，你就要去思考。我常說，讀書不是最重要，最重要的是思考，因為在思考的過程中，你會對自己有commitment (承諾)，來採取行動改變你的行為。讀書最重要的是將書本裡的東西吸收變成你的。

社會支持體系，平衡身心

一個人要保持身心健康、樂觀和積極，就必須要balance his life (生活品質的平衡)，建立社會支持體系。一個人失去了社會支持體系，生活品質就無法平衡。所謂社會支持體系有幾個方面，第一，對工作要有熱情；第二，一定是不斷學習的人，一個人要不斷的學習他才能保持社會競爭力，才能建立他的社會自信；第三，要與整個社會連結，意指參加某個社會團體，像教會，當你得意時，有人與你分享這份喜稅，當你失意時，有人安慰你，這就是所謂社會支持體系，角色的扮演非常重要。

每一個人，要去建立自己的社會支持體系，所以人必須與整個社會連結、結交知心的朋友。一個人的健康與否決定在社會支持體系的有無，而不在於運動方面。除了這三方面的社會支持體系對人的影響不及於家庭，家庭是生命充實與成功的根本，是生命的重心。它是個能讓自我休息的窩，你生病的時候，真正照顧你的是家庭，絕對不是朋友。它是個注滿愛的地方，而一個人的健康與否，心裡面一定要有愛。

當你在一個愛的環境中成長，你的生命才會豐富。另外，在時間的運用上，也要平衡，譬如說每個禮拜要讀哪些書，要花多少時間在家庭上、在與朋友的相處上，適度地調配自我的時間，就能保持生命的健康，當有壓力或困難時，就能支撐住，不被擊倒。有良好的社會支持體系，你就有足夠的能力去處理生命中任何的偶發事件。

說話的智慧---蘇格拉底

有一次，蘇格拉底的一位門生匆匆忙忙地跑來找蘇格拉底，邊喘氣邊興奮地說：「告訴你一件事你絕對想像不到的．．．．．．」

「等一下！」蘇格拉底毫不留情地制止他，「你告訴我的話，用三個篩子過濾過了嗎 ？」

他的學生察覺情況不妙，不解地搖了搖頭。

蘇格拉底繼續說：「當你要告訴別人一件事時，至少應該用三個篩子過濾一遍！第一個篩子叫做真實，你要告訴我的事是真實的嗎？」

「我是從街上聽來的，大家都這麼說，我也不知道是不是真的。」

「那就應該用你的第二個篩子去檢查，如果不是真的，至少也應該是善意的，你要告訴我的事是善意的嗎？」

「不，正好相反。」他的學生羞愧地低下頭來。

蘇格拉底不厭煩地繼續說：「那麼我們再用第三個篩子檢查看看，你這麼急著要告訴我的事，是重要的嗎？」

「並不是很重要．．．．．．」

蘇格拉底打斷了他的話：「既然這個消息並不重要，又不是出自善意，更不知道它是真是假的，你又何必說呢？說了也只會造成我們兩個人的困擾罷了。」

蘇格拉底曾說：「不要聽信搬弄是非的人或誹謗者的話? 因為他不會是出自善意告訴你的，他既會揭發別人的隱私，當然會同樣地對待你。」

因此，他訂出了說話前的三個篩子，不做始作俑者，當然也不要受人利用成了是非的傳播者。

流言比劍可怕，可以傷害一個人於無形，道聽塗說的人，等於是把自己的快樂加在別人的痛苦之上。

說話反應一個人的智慧，謹言慎行，言之有物是說話智慧的最高準則，會讓你一生都受用無窮。

最近在經濟日報看到一篇由鄭丹瑞寫的文章，值得分享:

急事，慢慢的說；

大事，清楚的說；

小事，幽默的說；

沒把握的事，謹慎的說；

沒發生的事，不要胡說；

做不到的事，別亂說；

傷害人的事，不能說；

討厭的事，對事不對人的說；

開心的事，看場合說；

傷心的事，不要見人就說；

別人的事，小心的說；

自己的事，聽聽自己的心怎麼說；

現在的事，做了再說；

未來的事，未來再說。

知人不必言盡　留三分餘地與人　留些口德與己

責人不必苛盡　留三分餘地與人　留些肚量與己

才能不必傲盡　留三分餘地與人　留些內涵與己

鋒芒不必露盡　留三分餘地與人　留些深歛與己

有功不必邀盡　留三分餘地與人　留些謙讓與己

得理不必搶盡　留三分餘地與人　留些寬和與己

Next Steps...

How to Make the Most of the "7 Steps to Natural Selling" E-course

Dear MLM Distributor & Members,

You recently completed my new e-course "7 Steps to Natural Selling" and if you have put the ideas and concepts into practice, you should be experiencing the following:

• More positive feedback from people – by having people be attracted and relate to you as opposed to rejecting you.
• More positive results, as a consequence of changing from a "me" approach to a "you and I" approach.
• A greater sense of personal fulfilment and inner calm and peace!

To help you turn the ideas contained in the course into practice, here are some suggestions that people have found helpful.

1. Practice, Practice, Practice!

Practice with real people all the time. Practice one thing at a time in small steps. Notice how people's attitudes toward you change as you progress.

2. Quantity Of Practice Is More Important Than Quality

Quality and understanding will follow as you get more familiar with the process. In the beginning you don't have to get it "right", but you must get it started!

3. Keep Your Conversations Relaxed

It's not always what you ask or say, it's when you ask or say it. Keep your conversations, well…conversational! Don't let your enthusiasm overwhelm people.

4. Let Go Of Your Attachment To The Outcome!

The outcome is a result of the integrity of the process. It's the process that will create the relationship and, ultimately, the sale. Let go of your outcome and your income will increase!

5. Do Not Start "Selling" As Soon As You Glimpse An Opportunity!

Do not jump in with your solution as soon as you hear someone say something like "I wish I had more money"! Instead, find out what is behind this kind of statement.

6. Go Slow To Go Fast

Take your time and look at this as a "journey of discovery".

7. Invest Time In People

If you only find one person a month, who joins you for the right reasons, and that person is prepared to do what is necessary to change their circumstances, and each person did the same thing, and so on, all within the same 12-month period, how many people would you have in your team at the end of the year? 4096! That's right, 4,096 motivated distributors and clients doing the right things for the right reasons.

Here's the key. Find the right people who want to join with you. People who want to make a difference in their lives – just as you are doing. Your team will be strong, loyal and work with you for a lifetime!

Hope you find these suggestions useful. Of course, the key to your success is to TAKE ACTION NOW! Apologies for "shouting" (!) but it's essential that you do something with this information if you really want to achieve the success you deserve.

Imagine what your life will look like when your business is successful. What will you do with the money you attract and how will you make a difference in the world? It will make a difference to you but what will you be able to do for your family, friends and others that you care about? And all this because you made a decision and took action on it!

To your success...

A Health Seminar on IMPROVING YOUR INTESTINAL HEALTH

Professor Tsai Ying Chieh, President of the Taiwan Association for Lactic Acid Bacteria and President of the Asian Association for Lactic Acid Bacteria, will educate us on the importance of intestinal health, how to improve intestinal and overall health through proper diet, lifestyle, exercise habits and through the use of herbal essential oil.

You and your friends are welcome to come learn health tips that will benefit you and family for a life time.

Date: Monday, 2 April 2007

Time: 7.30 to 9.30pm

Venue: Seminar Hall #02-04

401 Commonwealth Drive

Haw Par Technocentre

Language: Mandarin (with English translation)

Fee: $5 per person only

We are expecting a big crowd so please call early to reserve your seat/s and arrive early on that day. Call Alvin at 9833 9455.

Lesson #7 - Conclusion and the Next Step.

You Can Now Make Objections and Rejection a Thing of the Past!

Dear MLM Distributor & Members,

Welcome to the final day of this e-course. Congratulations on completing the course and investing in yourself!

Summary and Recap

Let’s recap what we’ve covered.

We’ve seen why conventional sales techniques, telling your story, presenting, handling objections and “closing” can cause objections and rejection.

In contrast, Natural Selling is all about coming from an inner place of stillness, calm and understanding, using your Personal Agenda to guide you and not manipulate you through the Dialogue Process. You do this by focusing on your Purpose of merely discovering whether you can be of help. In doing so you allow the other person to persuade themselves to look at your solution if it's appropriate to do so, by listening to them and letting them listen to themselves as they process what they are saying.

The four principles of Natural Selling are:

• The Purpose of a Business is Helping Other People Solve Their Problems.
• Asking the Right Types of Questions at the Right Time
• Listening to What is Being Meant, Not Just What Is Being Said.
• Feeding Back What You Think You Heard.

Natural Selling is a Problem Solving Exercise not a Persuasion Exercise. You use the Magic and Power of Dialogue to help people discover for themselves whether they have any problems you can help them solve.

By knowing what types of questions to ask, how to listen and how to feedback you remove your anxiety by taking the focus off you and putting it where it matters - on other people.

When you align yourself with these principles and consistently use the Natural Selling Dialogue process, you will discover that more people will be interested in listening to what you have to say and taking a closer look at your solutions.

Point to Remember: If there isn't a problem to be solved, will you have you lost a sale? Of course, not, because there was never was a sale to be made in the first place.

If there is a problem to be solved, you'll uncover it and know precisely how to customize your solution in a way that makes perfect sense to people. And, if there isn't a sale to be made you'll graciously bow out so you can quickly move on to other opportunities without feeling rejected.

What's more, you'll completely eliminate your fear and anxiety when talking with people about your products and business. Why? It's because you are no longer using conventional selling techniques, tricks or mind games.

Let me ask you, are you really 'selling' (in the conventional sense) when using The 4 Principles of Natural Selling? No you're not, except you'll be selling yourself!

Have you ever thought of yourself as a feature of your products, business opportunity or company? Of course you are! In fact, you're the ONLY unique feature!

If people buy you because you appear to understand them and what they are about, do you think they will want to know more about you and what you represent, such as your business, or even the way you go about life? Of course!

Asking the right types of questions at the right time, and listening with the intent to hear, understand, and solve other people's problems creates tremendous value in you and what you represent.

When you do this, people can't help but be attracted to you and your solutions! They can't help it because everyone (including you) is attracted to people who really understand them. What's more, they will be much more likely to do business with you!

The Next Step

At this point, have you discovered if Natural Selling resonates with your inner truth? Is it in alignment with your core values about respecting and serving others and/or about the way you want to be treated by others? Have The 4 Principles of Natural Selling caused you to reaffirm, reconsider or change what you thought selling and your business is all about?

If it has, ask yourself these questions…

• What if I could make this work for myself and be able to talk with anyone, anywhere, anytime about my business?
• What if I could eliminate my fear and anxiety about talking with people?
• What if I could totally eliminate rejection and objections, not through techniques, mind games and mental tricks, but by talking with people in a different way?
• What if I could significantly increase my success rate?
• What if I could create meaningful and long-lasting relationships with new people?
• What if I could strengthen my existing relationships?
• If I could do all of this, what difference would it make in my life and in my business?
  

Well, you can do this … ALL of it. And, you can do in your own style and with your own personality… not someone else's, but your own!

So if your present blueprint for your business isn't working for you, now you have the opportunity to change it, and I invite you to take the next step to achieve what you want in your business and life.

After all, will anything in your life and the lives of others change if you don't? Highly unlikely, and definitely not until you take appropriate action that makes sense to you. Whatever action you decide is best for you … DO IT NOW!

The simplest way to take the next step is to get your own copy of my book "How To Sell Network Marketing Without Fear, Anxiety or Losing Your Friends!" It's only $19.95 and will provide you with a complete roadmap of how to use "Natural Selling" to build your business quickly and effectively.

To get the details and order your copy, just click here

Thank you for participating in this Introduction to "How to Sell Network Marketing Without Fear, Anxiety or Losing Your Friends!"! I look forward to helping you in any way I can.

To your success...

Lesson #6 - The Importance of Feedback

I Know You Think You Know What I Said But...

Dear MLM Distributor & Members,

Today, we look at a very important part of the process.

Principle # 4 Feeding Back What You Think You Heard

To ensure continual understanding, feeding back what you think you heard, or clarifying, is something you will learn to do on a constant basis throughout your conversation, making sure that you're on the right track, using phrases like…

• "Let me repeat that to make sure I understand what you're saying” or
• "Would you go over that again to make sure I understand…"

Don’t take anything for granted as you progress with your discussion.

If you don’t understand something, ask the other person to repeat what they said or elaborate further. Also, summarizing what you think you heard gives the other person the opportunity to correct any misunderstandings. Words and phrases can often mean different things to different people. Remember, we are all individuals and we each have our own view of the world!

The ultimate feedback is at the end of your conversation and you are presenting your solution. This is the time when you are in a position to summarize what the other person is looking for, why they are looking for it and how you can help them get it by offering your solution. If you feedback, recap and present this based on everything they told you, you will have truly demonstrated a complete understanding. And people love people who understand them.

Let me illustrate this by describing a time when a lady called Barbara called me to ask about “Natural Selling”. She had read an article about Natural Selling in a magazine and was exploring the idea that it might be something from which she could benefit.

She asked me, “Could you tell me what Natural selling is all about?” I gave her a simple answer. “You know how many salespeople get anxious about selling because of all that manipulation they have to use and the rejection they have to go through? Well, Natural Selling is a way that will allow you to effortlessly and more quickly get the results you want, without using manipulation or techniques, and without the anxiety normally associated with selling. Would that be something you are looking for?”

When she answered “Yes”, I kept the focus on her and started with a favorite question, “Perhaps you can tell me more precisely what you’re looking for?” The conversation lasted about 10 minutes. During that time I said not one thing about Natural Selling or about me. I offered no observations or statements when she answered my questions. I just asked questions around what she was doing and, in particular, around the challenges she faced and how she felt about them. I listened, asked more questions, clarified and qualified as we progressed.

At the end of those 10 minutes, I asked her permission to allow me to feed back to her what I knew about her, the problems she faced and what she was looking for. During this time she twice stopped me and asked me how I knew certain things! She said that she had never spoken about them before to anyone. My reply was “From you – where else would it have come from because we have never met before, have we?” It's extraordinary what people will tell you if you listen to them. Why? Because you'll be one in a million who does listen, and if you do it with love and care, you become a very valuable person.

You create value in you and everything you represent with your ability to ask questions, listen and feedback.

Finally I asked Barbara, “If Natural Selling could help you solve these challenges and get the results you’re looking for by learning how to communicate more effectively, is that something that you would like to happen?” She answered, “Yes!” And I explained how my program would help her based on all the needs as she had outlined them to me. In two weeks she was on one of the TeleClasses I was giving at the time.

The point is that by not focusing on selling my services, but focusing on understanding her problems and getting behind them to see whether I could help, we both saw her challenges more clearly.

As well, when you understand what a person is really looking for and why they want it you will be able to customize your solution and present it so that it personally means something to them.
Tomorrow, we will review the material we have covered and take a look at the next step.

Exercises

• Have you ever been in a situation where you have been talking with someone and you realize that you’ve been talking “at cross purposes” – they meant something completely different from what you thought they did? Think about how that happened and the consequences of it.
• When you’re talking with people today, make a point of feeding back to people what they are saying to you. Don’t overdo it! Especially ask for clarification with words or phrases they might use that are unfamiliar to you.
• Go to a busy restaurant and listen closely to two people talking. Observe whether their conversation is on the same track or whether they are having two or more different conversations! If it's two or more, ask yourself whether you do the same thing and if you do, what you can do to correct it.

To your success...

Lesson #5 - The Power of Listening

The Most Important Skill You Can Learn

Dear MLM Distributor & Members,

Principle #3 Listening to What is Being Meant, Not Just What is Being Said.

Ask yourself. Do you really listen to people? Do you really listen to and actually attempt to understand what they are saying and meaning without letting your own interpretations get in the way?

This is how we normally listen. 45% of the time is spent doing what? Working out what we're going to say next - right?

Another 45% of the time is spent waiting for a gap in the conversation so that we can say it!!! Leaving only 10% of the time for actual listening!

So are we listening when we spend only 10 % of the time doing it? No we're not!

So what percentage of time must we listen? 100%!

To actually listen to, hear and understand what another person is saying, we must spend 100% of the time listening.

Now, you might ask, how do you listen 100% of the time? Well, here are a few clues.

First, you can think 10 times faster than most people can talk. If you know how the features of your solutions solve problems, you'll hear what specific features are relevant and how to talk about them later as specific advantages and benefits.

It takes the guessing out of what to present and how to present it. Imagine having all your features in lots of automatic drawers in your mind… just like your CD drawer in your computer… and having the correct ones automatically pop out based on what you hear a person wants.

Secondly, you don't have to think about what you're going to ask next, because what you're going to ask is found in the answers you get to your previous questions! It's all there! It's just that most Distributors and Direct Sellers don't listen to the answers. They are too busy waiting to say what they want to say and what happens? They keep meeting resistance most of the time!

Let's look at this more closely. What do you normally listen for when people reply to your questions? Do you listen to what you want to hear with the intent to reply based on what you want to say? Or do you listen with the intent to understand where the other person is coming from and reply to them based on their own deep inner truth?

People Have Two Truths

For example, if you ask a person whether they like their job, or whether they like the medication they are taking, are you hoping they are going to say no? In Natural Selling, it doesn't matter what they answer, because people carry "two truths" and the Natural Selling process allows people to reveal both sides of their truths, and which is the strongest one.

Here is an illustration. If I ask you whether you like where you live you could reply in two ways. Yes or No. If you said, yes, I would simply ask you what you like about it and ask you to expand on that. I would then test the truth of what you told me by asking later, "If you could live anywhere else, where would that be?"

If you gave me another location you will have demonstrated that there is another truth to explore, and one of those two 'truths' is going to reveal itself as stronger than the other.

If you replied 'No' to my first question, I would still ask the same questions!

The third thing you can do is to stop re-interpreting what people say to you based on your own biases or life's experiences, or your own judgments, prejudices and thoughts! All this does is get in your way of understanding. People don't think what you think they think! You're thinking that they do can get in your way!

For example, have you ever had someone respond to a remark you made and it was totally out of context with what you meant, and you wondered where he or she was coming from? Well, it's likely that the other person was interpreting what they thought you were talking about. Do you do the same thing to others?

Listening is such a powerful skill and more than anything else I know, if you learn how to listen to people you'll find that they will immediately be attracted to you and most will want to listen to you. A large part of my book is spent demonstrating how you can do this.

Now you've covered some of the basics behind the importance of listening, let's turn your attention to what you're listening for. We'll recap the Principle:

Natural Selling is Listening to What is Being Meant, not Just What is Being Said.

The two key words here are, said and meant. Said is the logical or factual side of the problem solving equation. It comprises about 10% of the problem. Meant is the personal, feelings or subjective side…and it comprises the other 90%.

In Natural Selling what is important is to focus more on what is being meant. Why? Well, do people make changes based mostly on logic or feelings? Feelings!

Allow me to illustrate it this way. Think of someone saying they don't have enough money. Is that a fact or a feeling? It's a fact! They might say it with feeling, but it's still a fact.

So if you were to ask someone, 'What one thing would make a difference in your life?', which is a logical question, and they said, "More money", which is a logical answer… and you then responded with your solution by saying, 'I can show you how to do that'… you would be responding logically and factually. And what response do you think you would get from most people? Negative or positive? Mostly they will reject your idea.

The reason is that talking logically with people won't help you very much to help them because you're only addressing 10% of their problem if they have one!

If you want to be of help, find out what is behind this problem called 'lack of money'. In other words, find out what is causing it, what it means to them personally and how they feel about it. Find out the meaning of what they say, not just what they are saying. You will find their answers are totally unique to them, and if you respond to their uniqueness as opposed to coming out with a canned presentation or script, you will automatically attract them to you.

"Facts belong to the world. Feelings belong to the individual". If you ask without manipulation, most people will tell you.

It's also where the relationship and the sale is. To be more precise, it's where both of you can discover if there is a need and the depth of desire to do something about it.

So understanding how to listen and what to listen for and how to respond is vital in the communication process.

And when you understand what someone wants and why they want it.... you will be able to customize your solution and present it in such a precise way that it will mean something to the other person based on how they see things. Why will you be able to do this? Because they will have told you everything you need to know to make your winning presentation.

Think about what we have discussed today and I’ll see you tomorrow when we will look at the fourth principle, Feeding Back What You Think You Heard!

Exercises

• Continue yesterdays exercise. Each time you have a conversation with someone today, turn it into a Dialogue, Focus simply on LISTENING to them! As far as possible, don’t say anything yourself except to ask questions and keep the Dialogue moving along.
• When in Dialogue, observe yourself and be aware of how often you have the urge to interrupt or finish the other person’s sentence for them! Ask yourself whether you're really serving yourself (or the other person) by doing this!

To your success...